I Want You Back!

i-want-you-back-godEveryone has had situations in their life that have deeply wounded and hurt them. 

I am not talking about situations where someone hurt your feelings, and in two or three days you are over it.

The situations I am talking about are those moments in time when trauma happens in your life that causes you such emotional pain you don’t know how to breath. Sharp stabs of pain pierce your heart, and you don’t know how you will be able to survive the next moment let alone the next hour, day or years of life you have left on planet earth.  Your life will never be the same.  It seems like every cell in your body screams out, “No!”

The cause of those gut wrenching moments are different in everyone’s lives.  For some, it is the passing of a loved one.  For others it may be divorce, separation or abandonment.   Other times, it may be a sudden illness or accident that leaves a person’s life changed for ever.

In my life, I have lived time after time after time with the pain stabbing me because of rejection. 

Rejection happens when you love someone, and you want them in your life forever.  You care about them, you love them, and you want to forever be with that person to love them and care for them and live life with them. 

However, for some reason that person chooses to reject and spurn your love and walk away.  They are not interested in being with you.  They may even tell you how much they dislike you or hate you; they walk away and you are left with a heart that is stabbed with pain.

Usually a sermon, devotional or story on this topic would share advice on how to survive through the pain.  It is true that I can tell you the answer is going to God – He does carry us through every pain. 

However, what I want us to do is instead of looking at our own pain; I want us to think about how deep that pain is when it happens to another person.  I want us to focus on one person – the person who has been the most rejected in history.  There is one person who stands out as the most rejected ever!  That person is God.

God has lived every moment of every day since He created His children with millions and millions and millions of His children rejecting Him.  God’s heart has screamed in pain as continually His children reject Him.

In the book of Hosea, God was rejected by His children; the children of Israel.  God chose a prophet, Hosea, to re-enact the story of what the children of Israel were doing.  He wanted them to see in front of their own eyes the story of how He loved them and how they turned and walked away from Him.

Israel had forsaken God and played the harlot with other gods.  Israel murdered, stole, worshipped other gods — in fact, the Bible says the more Israel multiplied the more they sinned.

God had to punish Israel; He is holy and righteous.  A good dad must correct his children.  A good dad cannot allow his children to keep running out into the street in front of cars, because he sees that they will get hurt or killed.  He loves them too much to leave them to do whatever they want.

When people reject us, we don’t want to feel the pain so we often then choose to in turn reject the person who walked away from us.  We say, “They don’t want me so I will just put up a wall and not think about them again.  I will forget them and get on with my life.”  That is not what God wants.

Jesus asked us to live differently.  He said in the Kingdom of God life is different.  We are to turn the other cheek when someone hits us.  We are to love those who hate us. 

God is and always will be the same.  The Bible says He never changes.  His character is pure true love.  God in the Old Testament, in the book of Hosea, did punish His children; however, the story does not end there.  God then began to share His heart for His children.

First of all, He remembered.  He remembered the good times with His children.  He remembered how He loved them, cared for them, delivered them from Egypt, and led them.  God had blessed His children. 

“And she did not know that it was I who gave her the grain, the wine and the oil, and who lavished on her silver and gold, which they used for Baal.” (Hosea 2:8)

Then after remembering, in Chapter 11 of Hosea, it says that God yearned over His people.  The rejected heart of the Father had those piercing pains that would never leave as long as His children rejected Him.  Here is what God said . . .

“How can I give you up . . . How can I surrender you . . . My heart is turned over within Me and all My compassions are kindled.” (Hosea 11:8)

Doesn’t that sound like us when we love someone and they totally reject us or leave us?  If you have a child that has rejected you or anyone you deeply love reject you, the pain hits you and you cry out, “How can I give you up?  How can I surrender you?  How can I live day after day without you?  Please come home!”

God felt that pain for Israel when they rejected Him. Deep gut wrenching cries from a heart of love.  

But then, God made this loving call to Israel.  He told them if they would only return to Him … 

“Therefore, behold, I will allure her, bring her into the wilderness and speak kindly to her . . . and she will sing there as in the days of her youth, as in the day when she came up from the land of Egypt. 

‘It will come about in that day,’ declares the LORD , ‘That you will call Me Ishi (my husband) and will no longer call Me Baali (my master). ”  (Hosea 2:14-16)

God wanted and yearned for restored relationship!

“I will betroth you to Me forever; Yes, I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and in justice, in lovingkindness and in compassion, and I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness. Then you will know the LORD .”  (Hosea 2:19-20)

God promised Israel if she would return He would bless her. 

Just like the prodigal in the New Testament when he returned home to his Father, God doesn’t accuse us or punish us if we return, repent and turn to Him.  God opens His arms and runs to us as the Prodigal’s father did when he saw him afar off.  The father then threw a party to celebrate because his son was home – that is what God wants to do!  The Bible says even the angels rejoice when a child comes home.  

Have you rejected God?  Are you in one of the following three categories?

YOU HAVE NEVER HAD A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.  Has God called you to Him or is He calling you now as you read this;  but, you so far in life have rejected Him and walked away.  You have said, “No, I want nothing to do with God.”  Yet, everyday you worship other gods.  A god is what is our source of life – what is it that you rely on for fulfillment – that is a god.   Does your god really give you peace and fulfillment?  Can you trust him to give you eternal life when you die? 

YOU ARE A PRODIGAL – YOU ONCE HAD A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD BUT WALKED AWAY.  Did you at one time follow God, like Israel; but your love grew warm and then cold?  Did you walk away like the prodigal?   Did you reject God and no longer have a relationship with Him and traded His love and care for gods that you think bring you more fulfillment?   

YOU HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD; BUT IT IS LUKE WARM – HE IS NOT REALLY GOD OF ALL YOUR LIFE.  Are you in a lukewarm relationship with God?  Do you perhaps go to church now and then or maybe every week; however, when He calls you to prayer and to spend time with Him you are too busy?  Has He asked you to do things; but, you have not surrendered and said yes to follow Him?   Do you spend your days in pursuit of wealth, accomplishment, status, success, or whatever else it is that is most important for you to obtain during this life? Where does God fit?  Does God look at you and hurt – does pain rack His being because of His deep love for you but you have rejected Him?

3317397_sOne of the things I have asked God is that when I go to Heaven I want to sit on God’s lap and hear His heartbeat.

Recently, God showed me that He wanted to share some of His heartbeat with me now.  Amazingly, it was not all cuddles and hugs which is what I was wanting and expecting.  Instead, He allowed me to be intimate with Him, and He shared the part of His heart with me that feels such pain and rejection and cries for His children to come home.  The very pain we feel when we are rejected – He feels every moment. 

God allowed me to feel on a very low level through my life what He feels like.  The Bible says that God is love.  He is perfect love.  God showed me that a human being could not handle the pain He feels. 

Perfect love plus rejection is pain beyond what a human can imagine.  God told me all the rejection I have felt (all the stabbing pain) is just a small peak into what it is like to feeling His heart beat for His children that have walked away and rejected Him. 

He also asked me to call His children home to Him.  “Be a voice, Esther.  Please call my children home to Me.”

Perfect God Love + Rejection =

PAIN beyond what any human could imagine

Please hear your Heavenly Father’s cry, “Come home! I want my children home.  I love you – please come back to me!  How can I give you up?  I love you!  I want to lavish my love on you!  Turn around, repent and come back to me.”

My prayer for you …

“I pray that the Holy Spirit will continue to speak to you and call you to the Father long after you have finished reading this blog.  I pray that this very day you will turn and return to God.

I pray that the angels will rejoice in Heaven as children come home.  They rejoice as they know relationship restored is the Father’s heart.  They know that every child of God that returns to God and puts Him first in their life lessens the pain in God’s heart.

Oh how You love us God!  Oh what a heart You have … a heart full of pain because You have true perfect love for Your children and You yearn for them to come home and be in restored relationship with You.”

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Worthy of the “Calling”

040_02_0139_BST“Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, “ (Ephesians 4:1 NASB)

Many who believe in Jesus do not live out their personal responsibility to God to walk in a manner worthy of their calling.  Many “appear” to have not been called.  Many are not interested in being called.

A Christian is called.  To be a disciple of Jesus means He has called you, and you have chosen to follow Him.

In 1 Corinthians 12, we are told that as a follower of Jesus we are part of the body of Christ.  Each one is a specific part of the body, placed in the body as God desires.

We are called.  With that calling is a responsibility to walk in a manner worthy of our calling.

Worthy means to be righteous, good, moral, ethical, upright, exemplary, blameless, honest, noble, pure, surrendered … true disciples of Jesus pursuing a life of transformation to become like Jesus. 

Search your heart prayerfully before God.  Ask yourself the following questions while in prayer with God:

  • When Jesus called you — did you answer? 
  • Did you choose to follow Him and answer His call?
  • What is your calling?
  • What are your responsibilities before God in order to walk in a manner that is worthy of your calling?
  • What are the distractions in your life that take time away from obeying the call of God?
  • What sins are in your life that you need to repent of and turn away from so that you will be worthy of your calling?
  • Have you 100% surrendered to the call of God on your life? 
  • Is there anything that you are holding on to that stops you from answering God’s call?
  • When you die (or when Jesus returns), will you hear the words, “Well done my good and faithful servant.”  Will you know in your heart that you endeavoured to answer God’s call to the best of your ability and lived your life in a way that was worthy of your calling?

“For many are called, but few are chosen.” (Matthew 22:14 NASB)

Only you can answer these questions before God.  Take time to seek the Lord.  Ask the Holy Spirit to shine a light in your heart and show you where you are really at in answering the call of God on your life. 

We only have one life to live.  Only what we do for God will last beyond this earthly realm.  What is most important for you in this life – the calling of God or your own will and way?

God is calling you!  What will your answer be AND will you walk worthy of that calling?

~ Esther ~

 

If You DO NOT BELIEVE — You WILL NOT LAST!

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” . . . If you will not believe, you surely shall not last.” (Isaiah 7:9 NASB) 

In the days of Ahaz, kings went to Jerusalem to wage war against it.  When it was reported to the house of David, Ahaz’s heart and the heart of his people, ” . . . shook as the trees of the forest shake with the wind.” (Isaiah 7:2 NASB)

God spoke to the prophet, Isaiah, and told him to tell Ahaz not to fear or be fainthearted.  Although the enemies had plans for evil, God said their plans would not come to pass.

God told Ahaz that if he would not believe, he would not last.

Our enemy still has plans for evil.  He often attacks us by reporting ‘into our thoughts’  —  “This will hurt you.  How can God be looking out for your best when the situation is so painful?  How can God be good if he allows you to experience pain?  How can God be a kind and compassionate God if He allows this to happen?  How can God be good if …?  Why did God not tell you the truth?  Did you really hear what God said?  Do you realize it has been ten years since God said that, and it has not happened?” 

These thoughts are deadly arrows of doubt that will make us not last if we choose not to believe in God.  The enemy will take us out if we choose not to believe.  The enemy knows how to precisely shoot his deadly arrows into painful places in our hearts in an effort to try and get us to not believe God and take us out of the race set before us.

” ‘For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.’ “ (Jeremiah 29:11)

God’s plans for His people are good.  He loves His people and wants what is best for them.  Yet, just as Ahaz and his people did, we choose to fear and mistrust God’s goodness when the enemy attacks.

God does great things in our lives.  He rescues us.  He puts us on a path of life that is full of adventure and excitement.  He carries us when we are weak.  He loves us and comforts us.  He never leaves us.  However, when troubles, pain, difficult times, slander, seemingly lack of finances, boredom, or whatever else that makes you personally doubt God’s goodness comes along, we forget who God is and His promises.  By not trusting God, we tell Him that we know better than Him what is best and that we don’t believe Him or His goodness.

In 2015, we humans are still the same as the children of Israel were in Moses’ time.  We are prone to doubt God unless we purposely choose to surrender to difficulties while trusting God to take us to our promised land. 

God loved the children of Israel and delivered them from Egypt.  He told them He was taking them to the promised land.  There was a journey they had to go on in order to be transitioned to the promised land, and they would face the unknown during the journey.  They were going where they had never been before. 

Their enemies chased them.  They ran out of food and water; however, God did provide BUT He did not provide in the way they thought He should.  They were bored with the food He provided.  How could God be good if He was going to feed them the same old yucky manna every day! 

They looked back and complained.  Wasn’t life better in Egypt?  They were not remembering the truth!  How could they worry about boring food when God just delivered them from being whipped by their masters whenever the master felt like it?  How could they believe God was not good when He took them from being slaves to free people?  Was Egypt truly as glorious as they were reminiscing that it was?

What was reality?  Reality was God loved them and delivered them and promised them a land flowing with milk and honey.  God was good.  He was providing food for them along the way.  He fought off and conquered their enemies in the most supernatural of ways with the parting of the Red Sea and then burying their enemies after they passed on dry land.  God’s plans were good for them even though they could not see it.  Even though they were experiencing fear, pain, boredom and seemingly lack of provision the reality was God was good and was planning such good for them if they only would believe and follow Him.

How God longs for a people who love Him – who trust Him.  If we love God, then we trust Him.  How He longs for us to know Him intimately enough that in spite of circumstances we trust He is working all things out for good, and we love Him by being patient with Him.  Amazingly the Bible does say that love is patient.  God smiles when we love Him by being patient with Him.

Hebrews 11 records triumphs of faith . . . Abel, Enoch, Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel, the prophets – conquerors of kingdoms who performed acts of righteousness and obtained promises.

“Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” (Hebrews 11:1)

“And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.” (Hebrews 11:6)

In Hebrews 11, it says that Moses chose to endure ill-treatment with the people of God instead of enjoying the pleasures of sin.  Moses had pain in his life.  He endured and believed God in spite of his surroundings.

When God asks us to do something, there is a surrendering to the process and transition of what He asks.  We must believe His plans are good even if we must endure pain.  Perhaps we need to learn to embrace pain as a sweet offering to God – a sacrifice – an act of worship that says though they slay me I will trust in You.

“Behold God is my salvation, I will trust and not be afraid; For the Lord God is my strength and song, and He has become my salvation.” (Isaiah 12:2)

I must believe – you must believe OR we will not last!  We must believe the truth!  Our sweet, gentle, loving, kind, just, compassionate, Shepherd God is working all things out for our good no matter what things look like, feel like, sound like – no matter what!  The absolute truth is God is good.  There is no evil in Him.

“The Lord of hosts has sworn saying, ‘Surely, just as I have intended so it has happened, and just as I have planned so it will stand.” (Isaiah 14:24)

~ Esther ~