“Run Home Esther!”

When I was five years old, we lived next door to a farm. Several children lived on the farm, and the boys in the family were older than me.

One of their favourite past-times was to play ball. One day, some of the boys decided I was old enough to play, and they invited me to join in a game.

I was so excited. I was now a big girl and was going to play ball with the older boys!

They showed me how to bat the ball, and I hit the ball my first time up.  As soon as the ball left the end of my bat, everyone started screaming at me.  “Run home, Esther!  Run home!”

I dropped the bat and ran as fast as I could straight towards home.  I ran straight past the pitcher, straight past second base and continued straight towards my house across the yard.  “Mommy, Mommy!”  By the time I reached my home, I was an inconsolable heaving mass of tears, mucous and regrets.

“How could they be so mean!  Why would they scream at me to run home!  I was only a little girl.  It wasn’t my fault I didn’t know how to play the game.  Mommy, why?”

Although my neighbours had invited me to play ball, no one had taken the time to explain to me how the game was played. I didn’t understand the goal of the game. I didn’t know that my destination after hitting the ball was to run home – to home base.

Sometimes I experience similar situations 45 years later in life.

“Where there is no vision, the people perish…”  Proverbs 29:18 (KJV)

A vision gives people a destination that is to be reached. It tells us where we are going.

If the vision is too small, only a certain number of people can play in the game. There is not enough room for everyone. If I try and participate when there is no room, I end up realizing I am just the little girl wanting to play in the ball game before the big boys decided I was old enough to play.

If the vision is not clearly explained, I won’t understand my destination.  I then become the little girl running for the wrong home in an inconsolable mass of tears, mucous and regret because the crowds are screaming at me, and I don’t understand why.

The little story from my past is a stark reminder that in adult life I need to take the responsibility to insure I know my destination.  I need to make sure the team I play on wants me to play with them.  I also need to make sure I know my part so I understand what I am to do.

I have a responsibility to listen to God’s voice (my Coach) and make sure I know the bases He wants me to run to while on my journey to home base – my eternal heavenly home. 

Lessons we learn in childhood are invaluable if we remember to practice them in our adult lives.



Tired? Weary? Discouraged?

my-projectAre you tired, weary, and discouraged?

Has God given you a vision – a work to do; but, when you think about following His leading, the vision is so large and overwhelming you just don’t have the faith or strength to believe God can accomplish through you what He has asked you to do.  Maybe you don’t even have the strength to begin the journey.

Perhaps you have started on the journey; but, obstacles and attacks of the enemy have been so great that they have distracted you. You have fallen down, and you are too weary to get up and keep going.  You are exhausted and tired.

Whatever circumstance you find yourself in; if you are tired and weary, God has you reading this for a reason.

  • God loves you and wants to give you rest
  • God cares about you and not just about what you do
  • God is here for you right now

I wrote a song a few years ago.  The words are:

When you can’t go on and the walls close in

When cruel voices whisper in your ear

When the light is darkened by clouds of evil

I am here!

          ~ ~ ~

I am here, I will not let you go

I am here, a shelter from the storm

I am here, I will not let you go

I am here!

          ~ ~ ~

I will break down walls

I’ll shatter darkness

I’ll surround you with my loving kindness

I will fight for you! I will fight for you!

That is what is happening right now.  God is fighting for you!  He is going to fight off your weariness.  He is going to gather you in His arms.  He is going to give you the rest you need!

Every human on earth can become weary.  It is not wrong to admit that we are weary and tired.  In fact, to not admit when we are tired is dangerous.  To live in an ongoing state of weariness and tiredness is dangerous to yourself and others around you.

There are many things that can cause us to become weary:

  • Grief  –  “I am weary with my crying, my throat is parched; my eyes fail while I wait for my God.” (Psalm 69:3 NASB)
  • Pain – When you are in physical or emotional pain you lose sleep and become weary.  “At night my bones are filled with pain, which gnaws at me relentlessly.” (Job 30:17 NLT)
  • Discouragement – We lack faith in God.  We don’t believe what He says.  We doubt and fear.  This is dangerous as it can be contagious when you share it with others.  “Finally, if any of you are afraid, you may go home.  We don’t want you to discourage the other soldiers.” (Deuteronomy 20:8 CEV)
  • Complaining – Have you ever been with people that complain.  If this complaining persists during a supper meal, by the end of the meal you are tired!  Complaining weighs you down and makes you tired!  Thankfulness uplifts.
  • God Testing Us – “Beloved do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal among you, which comes upon you for your testing, as though some strange thing were happening to you;”  (1 Peter 4:12 NASB)
  • Physically Overdoing It – Becoming burned out makes one so very weary.
  • Lack of Sleep – Sleep deprivation is the ultimate in weariness.
  • Working for God – By frantically doing everything we “see” that we think needs to be done but not listening to what God is actually asking us to do we just wear ourselves out.  Not everything we see that needs to be done is ours to do.
  • Bitterness & Unforgiveness – You stay awake reminiscing and remembering.  Your mouth gets tired of chewing.  The cells in your body get tired of being on edge about it all the time, and your brain begins making new thought paths where your thoughts automatically go to.  Your thoughts get stuck in those ruts, and you can’t sleep.  You get weary and tired because life becomes all about what happened to you. You get locked in a jail cell, and you are the one who hurts because of bitterness and unforgiveness.  It just makes you tired and eventually sick. It is a weight around your neck the enemy uses to try and drown you.  You think about it and think about it and think about it.  You talk about it and talk about it and talk about it.  You chew on it and chew on it and chew on it.  Someone hurt you or offended you or did you wrong and then you won’t let go of the bone.
  • Being Religious and Trying to Be Outwardly What You are Not Inwardly – You have not been transformed in an area of your life, and you are trying on your own to be good enough – oh so tiring!   
  • Being Anxious – “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs it down, but a good word makes it glad.” (Proverbs 12:25 NASB)
  • Fear – If you constantly live in fear you are tired. Fear of the future.  Fear of not having enough provision.  Fear of what people think … fear!

The results of weariness are so dangerous to us physically, relationally and spiritually:

  • We have no energy to fight our battles
  • We are overwhelmed and ineffective
  • We make bad decisions and fast decisions
  • We become uncaring as we have no strength to care
  • The Accuser’s voice becomes strong and overwhelming

Every aspect of our lives and those around us suffer because we are weary. The enemy loves it when we are too proud to confess that we are tired because he gains a foothold into our effectiveness for God.

There is cure for weariness and God is here with the cure:

  • Recognize and admit we are weak.  We are sheep and God is our Shepherd.  It is His job to take care of us.  We need His strength and cannot do it on our own.
  • Confidently approach God and ask for His help.  He asks us to do this.  He said, “Come unto me all who are weary.”
  • Ask the Holy Spirit to shine His light into your heart – into every corner and to sweep your heart clean of any sin.  Sin hurts and takes away our joy.  Sin is a leach that attaches itself in our hearts and sucks the life out of us.  How sweet it is to have a clean conscience and pure heart.  The Bible says blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God.  We want to see God!
  • Ask God to fill you with His joy – The joy of the Lord is our strength. Don’t be surprised in some cases if when you first ask God to fill you with joy the reverse appears to happen. I recently asked God expectantly to fill me with joy.  The very next day I cried the majority of the day.  I said, “God I asked for joy!”  But you see God answered my prayer. He knew there were hurts and situations He had to heal and deal with in order for joy to arise.  So He did bring joy; but, first He did what was needed to heal me.  Joy did come in the morning. 
  • Be still and wait – You can’t hear God if you don’t be still and listen.  Shut out the noise and clatter.  “Yet those who wait for the Lord, will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary.” (Isaiah 40:31 NASB)

God is here right now willing and wanting to draw near and help you.  Slow down … be still and come to Him.   Hear what He is saying:

“Come unto me all who are weary and I will give you rest.”  (Matthew 11:28 NASB)

Go to God – let Him hold you. Let Him fill you with strength.  Just be the little child He wants you to be and let Him hold you and rock you.  Fall asleep in His arms and rest this very night.  His yoke is easy and His burden light.  Enter into the rest of God.

May we be known as a people who know how to find their strength in the Lord and to be at rest.  A people that rests in God and accomplishes more than can ever be dreamed of or imagined by the power and strength of the Holy Spirit – nothing of our own.